jokes  
jokesHome jokesRandom jokesAdvices jokesContact
  10000funnyjokes on Facebook

Joke : Europe english

Rating: 2.2/5 ( 36 votes )

The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the EU rather than German which was the other possibility.

As part of the negotiations, Her Majesty's Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a five year phase-in plan that would be known as “Euro-English” .

In the first year, “s” will replace the soft “c” .

Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy.

The hard “c” will be dropped in favour of the “k” .

This should klear up konfusion and keyboards kan have 1 less letter. There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year, when the troublesome “ph” will be replaced with “f” . This will make words like “fotograf” 20% shorter. In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be ekspekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible. Governments will enkorage the removal of double letters, which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the horible mes of the silent “e” s in the language is disgraseful, and they should go away. By the fourth year, peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing “th” with “z” and “w” with “v” . During ze fifz year, ze unesesary “o” kan be dropd from vords kontaining “ou” and similar changes vud of kors be aplid to ozer kombinations of leters.

After zis fifz yer, ve vil hav a reli sensibl riten styl.

Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi to understand ech ozer.

Ze drem vil finali kum tru!

And zen world!

Language jokes :

14 funny jokes found

- Amazing anagrams

Amazing AnagramsDormitory Dirty Room Desperation A Rope Ends It The Morse Code Here Come Dots Slot Machines Cash Lost in 'em Animosity Is No Amit...

- English language

The English LanguageHave you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language? Let's face itEnglish is a stupid language. There is ...

- Spelling checker

Eye Halve a Spelling ChequerEye halve a spelling chequerIt came with my pea seaIt plainly marques four my revueMiss steaks eye kin knot sea. Eye strik...

- Quips & quotes

Q: How many letters are there in the alphabet? A: Twenty-four, because E.T. went home. ...

- Santa's helpers?

Q: What do you call Santa's Helpers? A: Subordinate clauses! ...

- Santa's wife

Q: What does Santa call his wife at tax time? A: A dependent Claus. ...

- Alphabet letters

How many letters are there in the alphabet? Noel, noel, noel, noel ... the angels did say... E.T. went home. Get rid of X. There's too many unknowns i...

- Canada language

How you can spot a Canadian, eh? -Don McGillivray (Ottawa columnist for Southam Newspapers)How do you tell a Canadian from an American? It used to be...

- Canada america

An American will say, “Hot day!” A Canadian will say, “Hot day, eh?” meaning “It's a hot day, isn't it?” This is s...

- Stop redundancy

The Committee for the Reduction of Redundancy and the Antiproliferation of Repetition has decided not to meet until they have their first meeting and ...

- Creative wording

BEING CREATIVE WITH TROUBLESOME KIN You are working on your family genealogy and for sake of example, let's say that your great-great uncle, Remus Sta...

- Europe english

The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the EU rather than German which was the other...

- Tips to improve your writing

1. Avoid alliteration. Always. 2. Never use a long word when a diminutive one will do. 3. Employ the vernacular. 4. Eschew ampers ands & abbre...

- A lecture about english

A linguistics professor was lecturing to his English class one day. “In English,” he said, “A double negative forms a positive. In s...

Comment the joke Europe english :

Make a link to this joke :

Link on a blog :

 
Find on 10000funnyjokes.com more than 10,000 funny jokes !
©2015 10000funnyjokes.com | Copyright 10000funnyjokes | Contact | Android download | iPhone download
Mentions légales / CGU - Politique de confidentialité