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Best funny Jokes Mom/dad

Here are the best funny Mom/dad jokes (37 jokes found):

- Expert on parenting

The following is a true story written by an educational psychologist and her experience on a plane. On a flight to Florida, I was preparing my notes f...

- Travel on the plane

For two solid hours, the lady sitting next to a man on an airplane had told him about her grandchildren. She had even produced a plastic-foldout photo...

- Shopping for goods

A woman meant to call a record store but dialed the wrong number and got a private home instead. “Do you have 'Eyes of Blue' and 'A Love Supreme...

- Kids tough question

Kids can sometimes ask the toughest questions. Son: Father, Can I ask you a question? Father: Ok ask. Son: When a doctor doctors a doctor, does the do...

- Adults have learned

Great truths about life that adults have learnedRaising teenagers is like nailing Jell-O to a tree. There is always alot to be thankful for if you tak...

- We have new babies

For weeks a six-year old lad kept telling his first-grade teacher about the baby brother or sister that was expected at his house. One day the mother ...

- Go to the hospital

Four expectant fathers were in a Minneapolis hospital waiting room, while their wives were in labor. The nurse arrived and announced to the first man,...

- Naming your child

There was a woman who was pregnant with twins, and shortly before they were due, she had an accident and went into a coma. Her husband was away on bus...

- Delivering a baby

A country doctor went way out to the boondocks to deliver a baby. It was so far out, there was no electricity. When the doctor arrived, no one was hom...

- Guests for dinner

The following is a true story. There was this little kid who had a bad habit of sucking his thumb. His mother finally told him that if he didn't stop ...

- Woman is on a bus

A woman got on a bus holding a baby. The bus driver said: “That's the ugliest baby I've ever seen. “In a huff, the woman slammed her fare ...

- Grocery shopping

A man observed a woman in the grocery store with a three year old girl in her basket. As they passed the cookie section, the child asked for cookies a...

- Mothers taught us

Things My Mother Taught MeMy Mother taught me LOGIC... “If you fall off that swing and break your neck, you can't go to the store with me. &rdqu...

- At the public pool

The lifeguard told the mother to make her young son stop urinating in the pool. ” Everyone knows, ” the mother lectured him, “that f...

- Defining teenagers

A Teenager is... A person who can't remember to walk the dog but never forgets a phone number. A weight watcher who goes on a diet by giving up candy ...

- Dad will never say

Top Ten Things You'll Never Hear a Dad Say 10. Well, how 'bout that? .. I'm lost! Looks like we'll have to stop and ask for directions. 9. You kno...

- Household physics

Laws of Household PhysicsEver notice that the laws of household physics are every bit as real as every other law in the universe? Here are a few exam...

- New family driver

Martin had just received his brand new drivers license. The family troops out to the driveway, and climbs in the car, where he is going to take them f...

- Mom's new recipe

Mom's Brownies RecipeRemove teddy bear from oven and preheat oven to 375. Melt 1 cup margarine in saucepan. Remove teddy bear from oven and tell Jr &l...

- You want children?

Are You Ready for Children? Mess Test: Smear peanut butter on the sofa and curtains. Now rub your hands in the wet flowerbed and rub on the walls. Cov...

- Evolution of mom

The Evolution of Mom Yes, parenthood changes everything. But parenthood also changes with each baby. Here, some of the ways having a second and third ...

- Newest son-in-law

A very successful businessman had a meeting with his new son-in-law. “I love my daughter, and now I welcome you into the family,” said the...

- Parents evolution

My wife and I are both the youngest child. Combine that with our own experience as parents and we often satirically talk about how things change as yo...

- Where you reside

... This reminds me of something yesterday at work. A colleague was relating a conversation he had with his young daughter, just a bit over 2 years ol...

- Term dictionary

Parent's Dictionary of MeaningsDUMBWAITER: one who asks if the kids would care to order dessert. FEEDBACK: the inevitable result when the baby doesn't...

- Child sent to bed

A small boy is sent to bed by his father... [Five minutes later] “Da-ad...” “What?”“I'm thirsty. Can you bring me a drin...

- Turned into a mom when...

You automatically double-knot everything you tie. You find yourself humming the Barney song as you do the dishes. You hear a baby cry in the grocery s...

- Things mom taught me...

My Mother taught me LOGIC... “If you fall off that swing and break your neck, you can't go to the store with me. ” My Mother taught me MED...

- The pre-birth class

When our second child was on the way, my wife and I attended a pre-birth class aimed at couples who had already had at least one child. The instructor...

- Pass out in shock

The man passed out in a dead faint as he came out of his front door on to the porch. Someone dialed 911. When the paramedics arrived, they helped him ...

- Have a first child

A man and his wife were making their first doctor visit, the wife being pregnant with their first child. After everything checked out, the doctor took...

- Great first parent

The First Parent by Bill Cosby whenever your kids are out of control, you can take comfort from the thought that even God's omnipotence did not extend...

- My wife is pregnant

A man speaks frantically into the phone, “My wife is pregnant, and her contractions are only two minutes apart!”“Is this her first c...

- Mom would never say

Things Mom Would Never Say” How on earth can you see the TV sitting so far back?”“Yeah, I used to skip school a lot, too”&ldqu...

- Fathers then & now

Today is one of the first Father's Days of our new millennium. Fathers of 1900 didn't have it nearly as good as fathers of today; but they did have a ...

- Out of food supplies

With four daughters and one son always dashing to school activities and part-time jobs, our schedule was hectic. To add to this, we kept running out o...

- Thoughts and quotes

The advice your son rejected is now being given by him to your grandson. Working mothers are guinea pigs in a scientific experiment to show that sleep...

 


 
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